A Complimentary Condom

I just got to Portland, after dropping Chip off at the airport in Seattle, and found  a complimentary condom on the night table, with the hotel logo on it, along with a set of foam ear plugs. Also, the decor is modern. Well, very mod, in a retro way. Molded plastic chairs, brushed steel, a platform bed. The hallways are outside, and made of astroturf. It is very clean, I don't mean to imply grungy. Just hipper than I'm used to. A lot hipper. On the cover of the Jupiter Hotel Directory there is a photo of a woman in a pretty dress, a la 1962 or so, laying on the floor of a room that looks just like mine, a glass in her hand, pumps kicked off, and the words, "Get a Room!" The first page says, "Blah, blah, blah, blah...Normally, here you would find a generalized welcome and  useless hotel hype. Instead, we'll just say there is free Stumptown coffee in the lobby 6-9 a.m. and enjoy your time in Portland." One of the recommended places to visit is a club next door to the hotel, "A suicide strip bar/classic rock lounge/modern day burlesque show, all wrapped into one. Packed on Saturday night, with couples, rockers, politicians, social climbers and the dregs of town- all mixed together." As to the Jupiter Hotel shop, you know how the Marriott sells their sheets? Here, they sell  thongs. There are bicycles to rent in the lobby, too. Then again, maybe someone with my track record should stay off bikes, especially strange ones in strange cities. I'm off to walk around the neighborhood. Wish me luck.


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