“Perhaps knowing that you are enough for one person goes a long way.” – In Fredrik Backman’s new novel, My Friends. (He also wrote A Man Called Ove and My Grandmother Asked me to Tell You She’s Sorry— and more.)
I did not want to go out into the cold gale of a night, but I knew I’d love the elementary school winter concert. I have never been to one that I regretted. Children earnestly making music, parental paparazzi, the endearing principal saying all the right things. The music teacher in a Santa hat, the audience silently – and not so silently—making sure the children know we think they are wonderful no matter if they forgot the words or squeaked the saxophone reed. Seeing my grandchildren I recalled how excited their parents were to stand on the risers and sing Jingle Bells and how nervous and proud they were in that beginner band, playing the trumpet, clarinet, flute for the first time in public.
It’s also so Advent, if you know what I mean— a light in the darkness and all the anticipation.You can’t put on a school concert without hope, faith and joy—can you?
The peace part can be more of a challenge. But lo and behold, there it was —in one little song that I will be singing for a long time. And it’s not what you think. Not Silent Night, not Jolly Old St. Nick not even the songs each class wrote themselves – about hot cocoa, the northern lights and snowflake milkshakes.
It’s the song the music teacher used for the transitions and asked the audience to help with. It’s the most important song of the night, he said. One Person at a Time. It was easy to learn, just one line, which we sang over and over as each class entered and exited the stage. We sang “One person at a time” when the kindergarteners walked off and the first graders walked on, as fourth graders stepped down from the risers and the fifth graders stepped up. We sang it slowly, evenly, very nicely, so there would be no rushing. We helped the children with our voices and our hearts. We kept them safe. No one even tripped.
But it’s more than that, isn’t it? The song of one person at a time, I mean–
It’s listening and speaking- one person at a time. It’s doing right by- one person at a time. It’s paying attention to –one person at a time. Respecting, seeing — one person at a time. And it’s a way to manage the weight of the world one moment at a time, one day at a time, one chore at a time. One cookie at a time, one crisis at a time and one gift at a time.
And yes, knowing that you are enough for one person does go a long way. Being the person who tells one person they are enough does, too.
One person at a time, one person at a time, one person at a time…
